Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Discretion

I have decided to anonymously blog my thoughts on the infinitely expansive World Wide Web and even alter details to confound my immediate identity but I still use discretion in what I write. And I have realized that in life, I can’t think of anyone who lacks some amount of discretion. Think of someone like Ann Coulter who probably has become well known because of her lack of discretion and expressing her opinion – I bet you she exercises discretion if it benefits her selfishly – to maintain appointments, ratings, network or publisher mandates…something. Conan O’Brien was just booted off the tonight show by NBC and he made his thoughts about this known on some of the final shows. But on his very last episode, you could see that he changed his tone a bit. He left viewers with a very favorable image of him and this all worked out fantastically for him. After it was announced that he would no longer be in the Tonight Show time slot, his ratings went up incrementally to max out on the day of last show. And when a ton of people are watching, and others like me are listening to the radio updates the next day, he was humble, grateful for opportunities, serious and supposedly honest. He had to pull this experience together to make himself endeared to by the public by showing that bit of shame and disappointment that his show failed and put a positive and humorous twist on it because he knows his career is not likely over. There was a ton of discretion, and we must know in every scenario there is discretion. I never liked him that much, meaning that I never liked his show or thought he was very funny, but there is one thing he said on that last show that I liked very much. He said, “All I ask of you, especially young people, is one thing: please don’t be cynical. I hate cynicism it’s my least favorite quality and it doesn’t lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.. I’m telling you amazing things will happen”. I agree. This is life, this is reality and although the world may never be totally honest with you, if you work hard and do the right thing, good things will happen to you. And get rid of the idea that you are entitled to anything and appreciated everything. OK, so for a team Leno member, Conan managed to score some points with me and I’m sure I’m not alone in that – good for him!

Monday, January 25, 2010

Pink Slips


I felt very down today - my work laid off 20 people. They held off for all this time without cutting staff, and now medical reimbursement has been cut again in New York so they absolutely could not meet their budget without lay offs. It is a lot of people and it just seems so cruel how these things are done - you tell someone as of today they no longer have a job. Go home. These people had no warning at all and now they have to go home and figure out what to do next. One man had been working there for 40 years! It wasn't based on performance or seniority. My only guess is that they wanted to eliminate certain positions and if you happened to have that unlucky title and be in that unlucky position, you lose. But unfortunately these things become political, and many times personal and I don't believe that every choice was well made and without bias. But that is life - at work, don't complain too much. You will be viewed as a nag and like you cant handle the work load. And make nice with your bosses. Like them or not, they hold the power to help you or hurt you. It is very advantageous to have a good demeanor and even keel temperament (though this wont always save you from misfortune, it sure can help). And lastly, be a bit intimidating. If you are a bit intimidating, for whatever reason, someone may be more afraid to do something to you for fear of your reaction. You may be intimidating because you are very intelligent, you are very serious, possibly unapproachable, or very attractive, or seem to know everyone and have some sort of upper hand at things. And in the back of someone's mind... these things may work in your favor.
I still have a job, and I deserve one, but I sure feel bad for all the others. In my department of 8 managers, one was laid off and I made my guess before this all happened as to the one of use I thought it would be and i was right. I know that ideally, it should have been someone else, but I know reality much better than idealism. Sometimes I have seen these types of things work out as a blessing in disguise, so lets hope that is the case for all 20 of my fellow coworkers.

Saturday, January 16, 2010

Work Relationships

I have a friend at my work who is interesting and kind of crazy in a lovely, endearing way. She has a big head of curly black hair that matches her crazy personality. I am sometimes lacking in expression or enthusiasm in my normal temperament so crazy people lend themselves well to me. I have driven her into work on several occasions when she did not have a ride, and in a way I enjoyed my out-of-the-ordinary conversations in the car. She is a bit dramatic but she has a good, honest heart and she is a good person so I like her. He major problem is her son, who seems to think he rules her house and has absolutely no responsibility except to go out and enjoy himself at her expense. My friend is a bit naive because she had never engaged in any teenage, rebellious activities so when she tells me her 18 year old son came home at 3am and a girl slept over with him, I have to give her my realistic opinion of what her "baby" is doing up there with that cute girl in her house. The problem is that she gives him too much, and holds him accountable for nothing- she fills up the gas in his car, she buys him a new cell phone each time he looses his(of course he needs the fanciest one), she pays for his speeding tickets, on and on and he has no job. She feels bad for him, may feel guilty for stuff and can't seem to cut him off and follow through with any threats. Do you know - this kid had a $180 speeding ticket, which of course she left him the money for, and he told her he went to court and paid it. She called up the court to see what happened with the ticket and they told her it was dismissed. So that little brat lied and took her money!
Since I talk to her often about her son and try to advise her objectively, I came to realize that some people can truly hold it together and be effective at work, and then fall apart at home. My crazy friend is a perfect example of this - she is very good at her job (a social worker) - she manages behavior problems and is professional and compliant with all aspects of her job and remains pretty upbeat throughout. But at home she has lost all control of her son and herself. I asked her if she could have a rational conversation with her son without yelling or flying off the handle and she said no. So what you see at work is not necessarily what is carried over into that person's personal life - I think we're all just a level worse at home. So be very afraid of those people who cant even keep it together at work.
Funny enough a new dietitian started where I work and she was coming in real early wearing super cute dresses and quite high heels and was very energetic and enthusiastic - it was great! I thought, wow, we sure did hire a good asset to our team! And if I have ever been that enthusiastic to start a new job, it probably only lasted two weeks. Sure enough, Upbeat Dietitian is coming in at 9 now, wearing flats and sucking down caffeinated beverages because she is now tired like the rest of us! But I must say that the initial impression of the first 1-2 weeks is what sticks with you. You meet someone and decide upon what you think of them. So my brain registered her as "friendly and enthusiastic" and she was not afraid to ask anyone for any information that she may need to help her learn the way and do her job. So even as she is sleepy, not as dressed up, less eye opening make up and revealing a more realistic mood pattern, my first impression still resounds in me. Morale of the story - put it all out there for two weeks even if it is unnatural, so that people who are paying a heightened attention to the new person will take away that good impression forever more. It is hard to unprove someones first impression, so make it a good one!